Tawbah: A Fresh Start

In life we all, including myself, make numerous mistakes.  Some mistakes are minor and some are major. Shaytan tricks us into thinking that yes, acknowledge the sin, that is the lesser of the two evils, you can make tawbah later.  I tell you first hand, this is a clear deception.  A wrong is a wrong whether one acknowledges it or not. We all are human and are prone to make mistakes.  When people we look up to make mistakes it shakes our foundation.  This is due to a foundational error on our part.  We think that person is the destination, the end all of everything, when in reality, Allah is the end all of everything.  Allah is the destination and always has been.  Sulook has always been called a path to Allah, and never was it called a path to the shaykh. The shaykh at the end of the day is also a human and he makes mistakes both minor and major.  Allah shows us that He is the Maqsood and Matloob.   The shaykh is like a ladder that one climbs to reach Allah. However, tawbah is such a vehicle that can take a person from the farsh to the ‘arsh in a moment.  It is for this reason that Hazratwala (DB) has said in poem, “Whoever has had the ability to seek forgiveness, then it is not permissible to say that this person is not forgiven.” I feel that we all should renew out tawbah and start fresh and let bygones be bygones.  The past is the past and nothing but tawbah can wipe out the past.  The present is a gift for us to adorn our future.  We all should constantly make tawbah to Allah.

Just an incident about my own shaykh, I had committed some major blunders and had defamed the name and honor of my shaykh.  I had informed Hazratwala (DB) about it.  I told him I made tawbah and cried a lot when I realized the extreme nature of how wrong I was.  He replied, “Do not worry.  Allah is Tawwab and loves those who make tawbah.  The tears you have shed, know that they have wiped out all the wrongs you may have committed.” I told him I am unfit to represent you after what I had done.  Hazratwala (DB) replied by saying, “Someone who forgets his way home in the morning if he comes back home in the evening is not sad to be lost.  Just continue the work you are doing and do it better than before.”  Hazratwla’s doors have always been open and so are our doors.  Insha Allah thing will be different and proper from now on.

Obviously it was not easy for me to write this, so I request everyone to make dua’ for me.

Ten Comments You Will Hear Before Pursuing Your Deen

For anyone who ever thought of growing a full fist-length beard, observing proper hijab and/or niqab, or dressing in an Islamic manner but have not been able to do so, this is a must read for you.  Insha Allah, it may serve to be a source of inspiration for those who wish to pursue Islamic education.  But most importantly, it serves to be a reminder for me and Insha Allah, a means of earning Allah’s pleasure by getting people to practice the Deen in its entirety.

Unfortunately, just before you take your first step on the righteous journey to pursue your Deen, your nafs and shaytaan be it your own shaytaan or people around you, even the ones who deeply care for you, will give you awful “advice” and sincere “nasihah”.  Perhaps it may not be because they have evil intentions.  It is because they do not understand the big picture—what your Deen means to you. They do not understand that, to you, the reward is worth the risk. In other words, a life of hell in this world or a jail as the hadith says is worth more than a temporal “paradise” for an unknown amount of torment the actual hellfire.

So they try to protect you by shielding you from the possibility of failure, which, as a result, also shields you from the possibility of making a Deeni life for yourself a reality.

Our time here in this world is limited, so let us not waste it trying to live someone else’s life.  Do not be trapped by lack of faith and Iman others have regarding themselves and you.  Do not let the noise of other people’s opinions drown out the sound of your soul yearning to live a righteous and pious life.

Here are ten tips (lies) people will likely tell you when you decide to pursue your Deen and the reasons why they are dreadfully mistaken:

1. You can follow your Deen someday, but right now you need to calm down and be responsible.

Someday?! When is “someday”?  “Someday” is not a day at all. “Someday” never comes.  It is not even on the calendar.  It is not on the lunar calendar, the Islamic calendar, and ISNA does not even know when “Someday” is going to be based off calculations because it cannot be calculated! It is a foggy generalization of a time that will likely never come. Today is the only day guaranteed to you. Today is the only day you can begin to make a difference in your life. And pursuing your Deen is what life is all about. So do not be irresponsible. Do not wait until “someday.” Make today the first day of the rest of your new life, and fulfill the purpose of your life.

2. You are totally at a loss if it does not work out.

Wrong! This is a giant, lame load of whispers and snares in the form of wasawis. You are not even close to being at a loss. In fact, the worst case scenario is that things do not work out and you go back to doing exactly what you are doing right now.  Well you can always make Tawbah, and return to Allah.  If the sun has risen from the west for these pessimists, then let them have their judgment, but in reality, this event has not yet occurred.  So make use of the time at hand.  The door for returning to Allah is still open and everyone has a free pass to go in, even those who were in and went out can return back in. Remember that the Qur’an says mankind is in loss and those who practice the Deen are an exception to that.

3. It is safer to maintain your job.

Sure, I suppose. But you know what is even safer than that? Going home, locking yourself in your bedroom, and never, ever coming out. And just like that,  your entire life and your Deen would go down the drain. Remember, safer doesn’t always mean better.  Allah is our Provider, and our Sustainer.  Allah provides so much sustenance to those who reject Him, to those who associate partners and ascribe children to Him, and to those who have unusual beliefs about Him. Yet, He never abandons them!  Are we worse than those people that Allah will not tend to at least our basic needs?!  Is this world not a testing center for us?!

4. Fully practicing Deen is impossible!

It is only impossible if you never do anything about it. The reason certain things seem impossible is simply because these people are not aware of anyone who has achieved them yet. But this does not mean that with your help these things won’t become possible in the future. If you truly dedicate yourself to an end result, almost anything is possible. You just have to want it bad enough.  The examples of our pious predecessors and the examples of the righteous people of today are in front of us.  Resolutions only become available to people of firm resolve!

5. Only a lucky few “make it.”

That is because those lucky few got off their rear ends and did something about it! They had the drive, determination, and willpower that you have right now. You can be one of them. It is up to you, and only you.  Keep in mind the lives of the pious people.  They had to deal with the taunts of people also.  In fact it was said that the recitation (Qira’ah) of Imam ‘Asim (the teacher of Imam Hafs) and the jurisprudence (Fiqh) of Imam Abu Hanifah would not reach outside Kufa….Look who gets the last laugh now!

6. You might fail and sin. And sinning is bad.

Failures which lead to sinning are simply stepping stones to repentance. No matter how it turns out, it always ends up just the way it should be. Either you succeed or you learn something: win–win. The biggest mistake you can make is doing nothing because you’re too scared to make a mistake. If you can’t handle failure, then you can’t handle success either.  In the end, you will have attained the love of Allah.  How you ask?  Allah mentions in the Qur’an that He loves the pious and the righteous.  But Allah also mentions that He loves those who frequently repent.  One will only frequently repent when one frequently fails and sins.

7. You do not have access to the right resources.

It is not about having the right resources; it’s about using the resources available to you.  Imam Abu Yusuf was a poor person.  He did not have the luxury to give everything up and sit and learn.  What he did have though, was his eyes on the prize and sincere yearning for learning.  That resulted in the great Imam Abu Hanifah noticing this and resolving to look after the financial needs of Imam Abu Yusuf.  Get it?  Got it? GOOD!

8. You need more money saved before you can take the first step.

You do not need more money. You need a plan. You need a budget. Eliminate ALL the nonessential costs in your life. If pursuing your dream requires you to leave your day job, figure out the absolute minimum amount of income that you realistically require. Studying the lives of those who have succeeded with similar ventures helps a great deal. But above all, take baby steps. Do not be foolish and assume that you must have a certain amount of money saved right now, or that you must quit your day job today in order to pursue your Deen. Instead, ask yourself this question, “What actions can I take right now with the money and resources I have right now that will bring me closer to the desired goal of practicing Deen properly?”

9. You do not need any help. It is smarter and better to learn and practice on your own.

You are the sum of the people you spend the most time with. If you socialize with the wrong people, they will negatively affect you. But if you socialize with the right people, you will be far more capable and powerful than you ever could have been alone. Find pious people who you click with and work together to make a difference in all of your lives.

10. That sounds like a lot of hard work.

You are darn right it does! But that does not mean it is not worth it. I think success in life hinges on one key point: finding work you love doing and knowing that Allah also loves that work.  As long as you do not do anything to incur the wrath of Allah, remain true to yourself and follow your own interests, values, and dreams, you can find success through passion. Perhaps most importantly, you won’t wake up a few years from now in a situation you and Allah despise, wondering, “How the heck am I going to be like this for the rest of my life?  What is Allah going to do to me if I were to die?” So if you are not breaking the laws of Allah, nor going against the Sunnah, and you catch yourself working hard and loving every minute of it, do not stop. You are onto something big.  Deen is not hard when you concentrate on it and make Deen your passion.

Disregard these misguided bits of nonsense and Insha Allah, you will be on your way to fulfilling your Deen. Now get up and go earn Allah’s pleasure!

Ten Comments You Will Hear Before Pursuing Your Deen

For anyone who ever thought of growing a full fist-length beard, observing proper hijab and/or niqab, or dressing in an Islamic manner but have not been able to do so, this is a must read for you.  Insha Allah, it may serve to be a source of inspiration for those who wish to pursue Islamic education.  But most importantly, it serves to be a reminder for me and Insha Allah, a means of earning Allah’s pleasure by getting people to practice the Deen in its entirety.

Unfortunately, just before you take your first step on the righteous journey to pursue your Deen, your nafs and shaytaan be it your own shaytaan or people around you, even the ones who deeply care for you, will give you awful “advice” and sincere “nasihah”.  Perhaps it may not be because they have evil intentions.  It is because they do not understand the big picture—what your Deen means to you. They do not understand that, to you, the reward is worth the risk. In other words, a life of hell in this world or a jail as the hadith says is worth more than a temporal “paradise” for an unknown amount of torment the actual hellfire.

So they try to protect you by shielding you from the possibility of failure, which, as a result, also shields you from the possibility of making a Deeni life for yourself a reality.

Our time here in this world is limited, so let us not waste it trying to live someone else’s life.  Do not be trapped by lack of faith and Iman others have regarding themselves and you.  Do not let the noise of other people’s opinions drown out the sound of your soul yearning to live a righteous and pious life.

Here are ten tips (lies) people will likely tell you when you decide to pursue your Deen and the reasons why they are dreadfully mistaken:

1. You can follow your Deen someday, but right now you need to calm down and be responsible.

Someday?! When is “someday”?  “Someday” is not a day at all. “Someday” never comes.  It is not even on the calendar.  It is not on the lunar calendar, the Islamic calendar, and ISNA does not even know when “Someday” is going to be based off calculations because it cannot be calculated! It is a foggy generalization of a time that will likely never come. Today is the only day guaranteed to you. Today is the only day you can begin to make a difference in your life. And pursuing your Deen is what life is all about. So do not be irresponsible. Do not wait until “someday.” Make today the first day of the rest of your new life, and fulfill the purpose of your life.

2. You are totally at a loss if it does not work out.

Wrong! This is a giant, lame load of whispers and snares in the form of wasawis. You are not even close to being at a loss. In fact, the worst case scenario is that things do not work out and you go back to doing exactly what you are doing right now.  Well you can always make Tawbah, and return to Allah.  If the sun has risen from the west for these pessimists, then let them have their judgment, but in reality, this event has not yet occurred.  So make use of the time at hand.  The door for returning to Allah is still open and everyone has a free pass to go in, even those who were in and went out can return back in. Remember that the Qur’an says mankind is in loss and those who practice the Deen are an exception to that.

3. It is safer to maintain your job.

Sure, I suppose. But you know what is even safer than that? Going home, locking yourself in your bedroom, and never, ever coming out. And just like that,  your entire life and your Deen would go down the drain. Remember, safer doesn’t always mean better.  Allah is our Provider, and our Sustainer.  Allah provides so much sustenance to those who reject Him, to those who associate partners and ascribe children to Him, and to those who have unusual beliefs about Him. Yet, He never abandons them!  Are we worse than those people that Allah will not tend to at least our basic needs?!  Is this world not a testing center for us?!

4. Fully practicing Deen is impossible!

It is only impossible if you never do anything about it. The reason certain things seem impossible is simply because these people are not aware of anyone who has achieved them yet. But this does not mean that with your help these things won’t become possible in the future. If you truly dedicate yourself to an end result, almost anything is possible. You just have to want it bad enough.  The examples of our pious predecessors and the examples of the righteous people of today are in front of us.  Resolutions only become available to people of firm resolve!

5. Only a lucky few “make it.”

That is because those lucky few got off their rear ends and did something about it! They had the drive, determination, and willpower that you have right now. You can be one of them. It is up to you, and only you.  Keep in mind the lives of the pious people.  They had to deal with the taunts of people also.  In fact it was said that the recitation (Qira’ah) of Imam ‘Asim (the teacher of Imam Hafs) and the jurisprudence (Fiqh) of Imam Abu Hanifah would not reach outside Kufa….Look who gets the last laugh now!

6. You might fail and sin. And sinning is bad.

Failures which lead to sinning are simply stepping stones to repentance. No matter how it turns out, it always ends up just the way it should be. Either you succeed or you learn something: win–win. The biggest mistake you can make is doing nothing because you’re too scared to make a mistake. If you can’t handle failure, then you can’t handle success either.  In the end, you will have attained the love of Allah.  How you ask?  Allah mentions in the Qur’an that He loves the pious and the righteous.  But Allah also mentions that He loves those who frequently repent.  One will only frequently repent when one frequently fails and sins.

7. You do not have access to the right resources.

It is not about having the right resources; it’s about using the resources available to you.  Imam Abu Yusuf was a poor person.  He did not have the luxury to give everything up and sit and learn.  What he did have though, was his eyes on the prize and sincere yearning for learning.  That resulted in the great Imam Abu Hanifah noticing this and resolving to look after the financial needs of Imam Abu Yusuf.  Get it?  Got it? GOOD!

8. You need more money saved before you can take the first step.

You do not need more money. You need a plan. You need a budget. Eliminate ALL the nonessential costs in your life. If pursuing your dream requires you to leave your day job, figure out the absolute minimum amount of income that you realistically require. Studying the lives of those who have succeeded with similar ventures helps a great deal. But above all, take baby steps. Do not be foolish and assume that you must have a certain amount of money saved right now, or that you must quit your day job today in order to pursue your Deen. Instead, ask yourself this question, “What actions can I take right now with the money and resources I have right now that will bring me closer to the desired goal of practicing Deen properly?”

9. You do not need any help. It is smarter and better to learn and practice on your own.

You are the sum of the people you spend the most time with. If you socialize with the wrong people, they will negatively affect you. But if you socialize with the right people, you will be far more capable and powerful than you ever could have been alone. Find pious people who you click with and work together to make a difference in all of your lives.

10. That sounds like a lot of hard work.

You are darn right it does! But that does not mean it is not worth it. I think success in life hinges on one key point: finding work you love doing and knowing that Allah also loves that work.  As long as you do not do anything to incur the wrath of Allah, remain true to yourself and follow your own interests, values, and dreams, you can find success through passion. Perhaps most importantly, you won’t wake up a few years from now in a situation you and Allah despise, wondering, “How the heck am I going to be like this for the rest of my life?  What is Allah going to do to me if I were to die?” So if you are not breaking the laws of Allah, nor going against the Sunnah, and you catch yourself working hard and loving every minute of it, do not stop. You are onto something big.  Deen is not hard when you concentrate on it and make Deen your passion.

Disregard these misguided bits of nonsense and Insha Allah, you will be on your way to fulfilling your Deen. Now get up and go earn Allah’s pleasure!

Smiling Tears Sailing Down My Cheeks

Allah Ta’ala says in the Quran that every soul shall have the taste of death. This is something that we cannot avoid, it is a harsh reality that one day each one of us will leave this worldly life and return to Allah Ta’ala and be judged for our deeds. Although some of us may fear our final return, we find in a hadith of Rasulullah (S) that he has said “Death is a gift for the believer.”

A believer is such that he spends his day and night in the pursuit of Allah’s pleasure.  At every moment he checks himself to see whether or not he is doing something that would cause the displeasure of his Rabb. When he commits a sin out of forgetfulness, he immediately returns to Allah and makes a sincere repentance, with hope in Allah’s mercy knowing that He has said in a hadith qudsi, “Oh Son of Adam, so long as you call upon and ask of Me, I shall forgive you for what you have done, and I shall not mind.” It is for the mu’min who strives for perfection for Allah’s sake, that perfection is unattainable, yet still remaining firm on this struggle for the rest of his life and making tawbah when coming up short, for a believer like this death will be a gift and the angels will come to him and say, “Fear not nor grieve, but receive glad tidings of Paradise which you have been promised. We have been your friends in the life of this world and are (so) in the Hereafter. There you will have (all) that your souls desire, and there you will have (all) for which you pray. A gift of welcome from the Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.” (Surah Fussilat). He will then be taken to finally meet with his Beloved and to live in the eternal manifestation of His pleasure, and will be rewarded with such an unimaginable reward that is spoken about in the Quran, “No person knows what is kept hidden for them of joy as a reward for what they used to do.” (Surah Sajdah).

Some of us may feel that we do not live up to these standards. That we live in such a state of heedlessness that we spend our lives gratifying our nafs and pleasing our own selves, that we forget the purpose of life is to please Allah Ta’ala. If this is our state then it is high time we wake up from our sleep and realize that our breaths are limited, and we only have a short time left to shape ourselves into such believers. We need to take the initiative in developing a proper relationship with Allah, and know that when we make an effort, Allah Ta’ala will definitely make the way towards good easy for us. Another thing is that Rasulullah (S) has said, “A person will be with whom he loves.” If we do not have anything to show for ourselves, then the least we can do is develop love for those who are the Beloveds of Allah. If we try to live our lives in such a manner that it has some similarity to the life of Rasulullah (S) and our mashaaikh, then we can only hope that this will attract the love and attention of Allah Ta’ala as well, and that inshaAllah we will be counted amongst such people on the Day of Judgment.

I pray to Allah that He grants all of us a husn al khatimah, an easy reckoning, forgiveness for all of our shortcomings, and acceptance of all of our meager efforts. Aameen.

– Salika

Back to the Basics

أَ لْحَمْدُ لِلَّهِ وَكَفَى وَ سَلاَمٌ عَلَى عِبَا دِ هِ الَّذِ يْنَ ا صْطَفَى اَ مَّا بَعْدُ

 “I think inshaAllah the focus from what I’ve been instructed by speaking to my own shaykh regarding myself and all of us, is that because we are so weak in terms of our understanding of deen, small little things need to actually be taught to us as a dars, as a lesson. Therefore, our good akhlaaq , our bad akhlaaq, exactly what they are, need to be told to us very clearly, without any hesitation without any reservation. Those people that can handle it, then they can handle it, those that can’t, they can’t. Insha Allah I will try to make it as palatable as possible. Human beings sometimes do such things that are beyond the imagination of the normal average human being, nonetheless extremities teach us how to keep a balance and moderation. So my Shaykh (DB) says: Allah mentions in the Quran after taking numerous oaths in surah Shams, Allah Ta’ala says, “And by the soul, Allah ta’ala swears by the nafs of an insaan, and then Allah says then we inspired it, with fujoor, which is open transgression and sinning against Allah Ta’ala. Thereafter Allah Ta’ala mentions wa taqwaha, and then Allah inspired it with piety or taqwa or fear of Allah, or however you want to translate the word Taqwa. Nonetheless, Insaan innately has Fujoor first and taqwa afterwards. After stating all these oaths, Allah ta’ala says the person who purifies their soul is the one who has achieved falaah, success. Falaah could also mean that such a wealth after which there is no poverty, such health after which there is not sickness, such happiness after which there is no sadness or grief, and so on and so forth.  Allah Ta’ala then says and that person who has defiled their nafs and is in truly a state of loss. Hakeem ul Ummat Mujaddid ul Millat, Mawlana Ashraf Ali Thanwi (Nawarallahu Marqadahu) says that reformation of oneself is Fardh ‘ayn, mandatory and obligatory on each individual. He would also say the verb to reform, “tazkiya,” is a transitive verb, so we learn that it is not such a verb which can be carried out by the person who does the verb. In other words, the person cannot purify themselves. It requires a purifier and the one being purified.

Those who understand the Quran, one of the purposes of prophethood is that Rasullullah was sent, Allah says “wa yuzakkeekum”, so therefore the job of purification and reformation of society is one of the purposes of prophethood so since there is a dire need for a reformer also since what leads to an obligation is also obligatory. Anything that leads to a Fardh is also Fardh. For example, wudhu on its own is not Fardh, but when you need to pray salat, it’s necessary to have wudhu. Similarly, tazkiya on its own is a Fardh, so anything that leads to that is also obligatory.  So it’s basically imperative to find such a person that can cleanse ones’ evil qualities and should seek out there company. Until a person does not have adequate knowledge regarding the praiseworthy and blameworthy traits of the self, of the person’s nafs, the person won’t be able to gauge what is good and what is bad unless they have some grounding some base knowledge. So instead, out of ignorance, what people do is take good as bad and bad as good. Similarly, many people go sit in the company of pious saints and pious people and what not, but since they’re unaware of their evil traits within themselves, or they are aware but don’t reveal it to those people to help themselves out, so what it is, is that they acquire company and that’s all they get. So a person can come, my shaykh gives this example , he says a person can come sit with me every day after ‘asr time and we’ll have a cup of tea, and we’ll chit chat, and we’ll be really good friends, but that’s all that person will get out of it. He really won’t get any benefit.  As far as the evil qualities within that person, they will never leave unless that person says “Shaykh I have this problem, what do I do? Can you please help me solve this problem of mine or this issue of mine?”  So the diseases which are in one’s heart or in one’s akhlaaq in one’s, for example we all know how to pray, its very easy to say these are the faraidh, these are the Sunnahs of salat etc, but can we really say that in our salah are we connected to Allah Ta’ala or not? If we can say that, then masha Allah the job is done. If we can’t, then that’s a serious issue. Basically it’s like a person comes to school and the teacher takes attendance and says “yes, this person showed up to school”, but after staying seven periods and leaves, does the student learn anything, now that’s another story. So that’s basically what this is suppose to be about, obviously we didn’t really start anything, but the idea is that to understand that these things have to be learnt. They have to be learnt by somebody who learnt them from somebody else etc.

Our deen is Islam, we need to learn how to submit and if we don’t, nothing really happens, nothing really works. If a person cannot submit themselves in the presence of a pious person or the servants of pious people, then beyond that, they will not receive any help; you can’t do things on your own. Those people who think they can solve their own issues are the biggest fools on earth. They’re fools not because I’m saying they’re fools but because Allah ta’ala is saying it’s not something you can do on your own. If it was, Allah would not have sent down so many ambiyaa, Allah would’ve instead just sent down one or two prophets and that’s it, and then Allah would say, “Hey this is what you need to do so on and so forth, figure it out. This is the Quran, this is the Torah, this is the Zaboor, this is the Injeel, figure it out on your own, there’s no need for ambiyaa,” if that was the case, but that wasn’t the case. There are only four books and there are hundreds and thousands of ambiyaa. So a person has to use their common sense and understand that’s how things work and if we can figure at least that much out, then InshaAllah our lives will be much better. “

وَ آ خِرُدَعْوَا نَا اَنِ الحَمْدُ لِلَّهِ ربِّ الْعَا لَميْن